Comments for Skies of Glass

Comment on To Find A Home 20 by Chris

Chris — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 18:25:38 +0000

Thanks! Glad you like it. I’m enjoying your proofreading! :)

Comment on To Find A Home 20 by Daniel L

Daniel L — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 16:47:24 +0000

Essem had noticed a [CHANGE] in the people of the settlement.

I’m enjoying your story very much!

Comment on To Find A Home 19 by Daniel L

Daniel L — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 00:10:45 +0000

To defy that knowledge was not only insulting, it was [DISRESPECTFUL] and often unwise.

Comment on To Find A Home 18 by Daniel L

Daniel L — Wed, 28 Dec 2011 19:12:59 +0000

“He remembered that his mom [HAD] always used the term ‘market’ when describing these types of buildings”

I guess that’s the correct way to write it.

Comment on To Find A Home 16 by Daniel L

Daniel L — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 04:57:57 +0000

His hands clenched into fists and his jaw [STARTED] to tighten

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #47 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Sat, 19 Nov 2011 08:54:36 +0000

Greetings Wayne,
I know its been awhile since this was posted and even longer since I commented, but finally got the chance to sit down and finish reading your story. It was very good and shows great promise in you as a writer… I say that as an avid reader, and no publisher or anything, so take it for what its worth… but I would gladly read something you wrote again. I hope all goes well.

Comment on To Find A Home 11 by lvl20dm

lvl20dm — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 19:37:14 +0000

nice!
i just got caught up on the last few weeks’ entries.
really enjoying what you have so far – looking forward to reading more!

Comment on To Find A Home 11 by Daniel L

Daniel L — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 06:29:23 +0000

His [TONE] turned flat and all happiness left his voice.

I’m enjoying the story very much. Look forward to the next entry!

Comment on To Find A Home 9 by Chris

Chris — Sun, 23 Oct 2011 03:44:44 +0000

Daniel, thanks again for the catch. You are damn good at that! :) It has been fixed, along with the other one you caught a few parts back.

Comment on To Find A Home 9 by Daniel L

Daniel L — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 02:47:09 +0000

James could feel his feet getting heavy. His [ARM] burned and he was sweating.

Comment on To Find A Home 4 by Chris

Chris — Tue, 13 Sep 2011 21:52:04 +0000

Thanks to both of you. Glad you are liking it, and glad you caught the typo. I’ll get that fixed.

Comment on To Find A Home 4 by Daniel L

Daniel L — Tue, 13 Sep 2011 15:13:17 +0000

Loving the story!

One quick correction:

Maple’s heart sank. Her pursuers were right next to them, and making camp. They would [FIND] them for sure.

Comment on To Find A Home 4 by lvl20dm

lvl20dm — Mon, 12 Sep 2011 19:48:19 +0000

great names, again!
liking the story so far…

Comment on To Find A Home 1 by Wayne

Wayne — Mon, 22 Aug 2011 16:04:44 +0000

Welcome to the wonderful world of serial fiction. I hope you find it as rewarding as I have.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #47 by Stu

Stu — Sat, 25 Jun 2011 12:04:56 +0000

Hi Wayne,

I just sat and read this in an evening. Great stuff. You might want to do a search on the following words “riffle”, “site” and “sight” and fix them.

I really enjoyed the story. For your next effort, you might want to look at having simultaneous plot lines which you switch back and forth from rather than just one continuing narrative. I really thought that given how awesome she was, that we were going to find out that Chloe was a GC. :)

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #47 by Draks

Draks — Sat, 07 May 2011 01:58:58 +0000

I don’t think the ending was sappy at all Wayne. Being a fan fiction writer myself I know how hard it is sometimes to close out a story especially one that you have pored so much into.

Thanks, it was a good ride and well done. Good job.

Draks

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #47 by Wayne

Wayne — Tue, 03 May 2011 05:46:11 +0000

Yeah I know the ending is a bit sappy/cheesy. After almost a year though it is finally done. Now comes the massive edits to translate this into an e-book. I hope everyone has enjoyed the ride as much as I have. Keep an eye on the site over the next few weeks for Skies of Glass:Metropolis news and possibly a new serial fiction.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #46 by Wayne

Wayne — Tue, 26 Apr 2011 03:17:03 +0000

There is only one more week left to go now.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #45 by Wayne

Wayne — Tue, 19 Apr 2011 07:33:18 +0000

Ok, only two more parts left to go and Skies of Glass: Metropolis will be complete. Well the serial fiction portion of it will be. Keep an eye on this blog for an unrelated Skies of Glass fiction project that will begin when mine finishes.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #42 by Wayne

Wayne — Tue, 29 Mar 2011 03:39:44 +0000

Hey guys, sorry about the one week delay on this one. There are only 5-6 parts left to this story. The closing scene to this week is one that has been in my mind for quite a while. My wife hates the cliff hangers, but I personally love them.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #41 by Daniel

Daniel — Tue, 15 Mar 2011 15:22:15 +0000

Joe’s injuries were going to keep him out of the fight and that seemed to make him [very] angry.

The image of Connie ripping apart the man who had been chasing them [filled] Jim’s mind.

His body [shuddered] at the memory and suddenly he wasn’t so sure he was ready to see Connie again.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #40 by Norm Gross

Norm Gross — Thu, 10 Mar 2011 21:08:15 +0000

Just one part glared out at me….

“He was thought he had them all lain out correctly, “… Should that be “He thought he had them all lain out correctly, “?

Been loving the story.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #37 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Fri, 18 Feb 2011 23:04:20 +0000

Hehe. Its just a suggestion, technically you dont have to say anything and say it’s author’s choice.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #37 by Wayne

Wayne — Thu, 17 Feb 2011 18:04:43 +0000

LOL, My wife and I debated on the “…” I have to admit to her that she was right now.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #37 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Tue, 15 Feb 2011 21:49:37 +0000

With Chloe’s help[,] he dragged Davison over to Buttercup and they threw him up on her back.

“[...]so we should ride in slow to avoid spooking anyone. That will also let us turn and run if we find that it’s not our people.”

“Got it[.]” Jim said and hoped that hadn’t missed anything too important. When Chloe climbed aboard Buttercup and wrapped her arms around him again[,] he quit worrying for a moment and just enjoyed the feel. He decided that no matter how many times he experienced the sensation of being up on Buttercup with Chloe holding him tight he would still be mesmerized each time.

——
Awesome. I was wondering when the lions would get to play.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #36 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Tue, 15 Feb 2011 21:41:23 +0000

“It’s morning. Dad should have [been] back a long time ago.”

After a few minutes[,] Jim walked back over to Chloe and the animals. Chloe had pulled a mirror out of her bag and was brushing her hair back into its ponytail. “So what’s the deal[?] [H]ave they heard from your dad?”

Loved Jim’s decision in this one.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #36 by Wayne

Wayne — Tue, 15 Feb 2011 02:29:53 +0000

Wow, I see what you mean. The feed is about 3-4 releases behind.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #36 by Daniel

Daniel — Sat, 12 Feb 2011 15:04:25 +0000

There seems to be a problem with the RSS feed. The new updates aren´t showing.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #34 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Wed, 02 Feb 2011 23:10:31 +0000

Agreed. Length is fine. Not having trouble keeping up so I say keep it up. As far as edits:

“James put his back to the door and faced the crowd. (remove the quotation mark as he’s not saying anything)

“So if we can’t have her carry him, and we can’t leave him here[,] can I just go ahead and shoot him now?”

She was a Lion not a horse. (is Lion supposed to be capitalized b/c its a GC?)

I made those copies from the originals. In the early days after the bombs they were desperately trying to take every electronic book they had and get it written down while they still could. (had a question on this because it was unclear as to why the rush… e-books would run out of electricity I assume?)

Also, James has more restraint than I would re Davidson being made to face trial as opposed to a bullet right now. Especially in the middle of a combat situation, I wouldnt have taken the risk. But its neat for James too ;)

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #33 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Tue, 01 Feb 2011 16:24:09 +0000

She pulled a knife ou[t] from behind her back and pushed it against his crotch. “If you don’t tell me I’m going to cut your balls off and then ask again.”

The man hacked and struggled to get his breathe. “Ok, I’ll talk. What do you want to know?”

“Where d[id] these men come from and why are they here?”

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #34 by Norm Gross

Norm Gross — Mon, 31 Jan 2011 20:45:09 +0000

Congrats on the 40K. And yes, I am still enjoying the story.

As far as feedback about the length… Whatever allows you to keep up the once a week schedule. Or, rather, whatever allows you to keep your interest in it.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #34 by Wayne

Wayne — Tue, 25 Jan 2011 04:26:40 +0000

Part 34 is by far the longest part yet. Of course that means It will probably have the most edits needed yet as well. I chose to release this double sized issue because as of this release I now have more than 40,000 words released in this story. I hope you all are still enjoying reading as much as I am enjoying writing. I would love to get some feedback on length because I have intentionally kep the word count fairly low thus far.

Comment on A New Years Message from the Author by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Fri, 07 Jan 2011 15:17:24 +0000

Happy New Year to you as well!

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #31 by Daniel

Daniel — Tue, 04 Jan 2011 18:08:45 +0000

First sentence first paragraph:

After a few minutes the group had 6 bottles filled with a clear liquid that Michael [HAD] sworn to them was the most flammable thing in the fort.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #29 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Tue, 21 Dec 2010 15:13:10 +0000

“They already got two of them.” [J]im looked at her. “Why did you come out here to sit with me instead of staying in there planning?””

Only a minor correction as always. Not surprised that in a post-apocalyptic world that gender bias would reassert itself. Its a mark of civility/practicality that they let Chloe in the militia. They addressed a similiar issue in one of the Walking Dead episodes. Good show if you havent checked it out yet, I would recommend it.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #28 by Norman Gross

Norman Gross — Wed, 15 Dec 2010 17:02:28 +0000

I just wanted to drop you a note that I have been enjoying the story that you are writing. Thank you for taking the time (and also brave enough) to post your work.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #26 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Wed, 01 Dec 2010 23:04:05 +0000

“Slinkard I want you in town right [now] sounding the alarm.”

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #26 by Daniel

Daniel — Tue, 30 Nov 2010 18:17:53 +0000

I want battalions of men here immediately. We secure this sight then sent backup to James.”

I guess it should be:

I want battalions of men here immediately. We secure this SITE then SEND backup to James.”

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #25 by Wayne

Wayne — Tue, 30 Nov 2010 04:53:29 +0000

Thank you so much for the comment and all the editing comments as well. The feedback really keeps me energized.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #25 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Tue, 23 Nov 2010 16:37:11 +0000

“Chloe’s first kick hit the man in the knee[d] and knocked him back. She pulled her leg back tight and kicked out again.” Delete the “d”.

“He moved so quickly that the stunned guard who had forgotten about him in his struggle with Chloe did not have a chance to reach [ ].” What was he trying to reach? Jim? If so, just needs a “him” in the blank space.

Damn good this week sir. Man, I thought Jim was done and he wasn’t coming out of that shell.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #22 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Thu, 11 Nov 2010 20:57:51 +0000

Fourth paragraph, “She bit her lip a bit as she though.” thoughT?

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #21 by Jahaili

Jahaili — Mon, 01 Nov 2010 13:00:56 +0000

Wayne – excellent story. I really enjoy reading this!

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #20 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Wed, 20 Oct 2010 20:58:35 +0000

Second to last paragraph:
“She sobbed into his shoulders and then gave a pained his as he touched her back.” I think you meant hisS.

Keep it coming man. Good stuff.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #18 by Wayne

Wayne — Tue, 12 Oct 2010 01:22:40 +0000

Thanks for the edits. I only have one person doing proofreading and editing at the moment and while she is a big help, she isn’t the best for grammar issues.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #18 by Zenaficus

Zenaficus — Fri, 08 Oct 2010 22:09:28 +0000

Ok, on the edge of my seat here… argh. ;)

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #18 by Daniel

Daniel — Tue, 05 Oct 2010 17:43:29 +0000

There´s a couple typos un the 5th paragraph.
- He was afraid, but he couldn’t let Chloe risk herself in her current state of MIND.
- He realized a few SECONDS later that he should have been more worried about Joe.

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #18 by Wayne

Wayne — Tue, 05 Oct 2010 03:24:01 +0000

The biggest cliffhanger I have left you with yet. Yeah I’m a bit of a bastard for this one. Today’s story is probably the most action packed yet and will likely be expanded to twice it’s current size for the PDF novel when the story is complete.

Comment on A Pause by Jasin Wayne

Jasin Wayne — Mon, 13 Sep 2010 19:33:35 +0000

Dan,

Can you please send me an email at the below email. I am still not able to gain access to my previous email address and I am in need of your contact information. I am hoping you will see this right away so I can fill you in on a few things and start sending some artwork your way. If you have sent anything to my previous email address, consider it gone.

Thanks! Looking forward to your response.

Comment on Chapter 1, Page 8 by Speckles

Speckles — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 13:04:58 +0000

*poke*

Comment on A word from the Author by Chad Valdes

Chad Valdes — Wed, 11 Aug 2010 17:40:03 +0000

Greetings Wayne,
I just wanted to take a moment as well, and tell you how much I have enjoyed reading the story so far. I have a ton of questions bouncing around in my head regarding what might happen, why certain technology is missing, but some others are present, etc. I really like that Jim out as a recruit and look forward to learning about the world through his eyes. Keep up the good work!

Regards,
Chad Valdes
(zenaficus on the forums)

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #7 by Alan G

Alan G — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 09:12:38 +0000

Really enjoyong the story so far. Just catching up on FTB podcasts and read them in one go.

Comment on Chapter 1, Page 8 by sandpunk

sandpunk — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 09:34:16 +0000

*poke poke*

Comment on Skies of Glass: Metropolis #1 by Wayne

Wayne — Mon, 31 May 2010 15:18:43 +0000

Hey everyone. I’m proud to present the first week of actual story. This will be a weekly feature until we reach the end of the story. If it does well then there may be future stories told in this setting. Also this is a new medium for me in regards to presenting fiction and every step will be learning process. Feel free to e-mail me any comments or suggestions. Again I hope everyone enjoys the story.

Comment on Chapter 1, Page 8 by Kenny Young

Kenny Young — Sun, 30 May 2010 22:11:56 +0000

It says “SON?”, right there at the bottom.

Comment on Chapter 1, Page 8 by Chris

Chris — Mon, 10 May 2010 13:04:52 +0000

Heh! I like that one. Very clever. :)

Comment on Chapter 1, Page 8 by Ralph Weimer

Ralph Weimer — Sun, 09 May 2010 00:13:52 +0000

It says the writer isn’t doing much work here.

Comment on Chapter 1, Page 1 by DistinctlyBenign

DistinctlyBenign — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 19:02:02 +0000

Wooo, I’m a huge webcomic fan. I will follow this with anticipation.

Makes me sad I didn’t play Skies of Glass at FtC3.

Comment on Chapter 1, Page 1 by Gorkamorka

Gorkamorka — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 09:01:38 +0000

Jesus Saves… isn’t that a nod to GTA 2? :)

Comment on Chapter 1, Page 1 by Chad

Chad — Mon, 15 Mar 2010 16:20:01 +0000

I love how all the graffiti is so belligerent but the one at the bottom says Jesus Saves. :)